The Day After Christmas - Many Bills To Pay

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Twas the day after Christmas and all through the house
Children sat slack-jawed, bored on the couch.

Wrappings and toys littered the floor,
An incredible mess that I did abhor.

With Mom in her robe and I in my jeans,
We waded in to get the place clean.

When suddenly the doorbell: it started to clatter,
I sprang to the Security-View to check out the matter.

The new-fallen snow, now blackened with soot,
Was trampled and icy and treacherous to foot.

But suddenly in view, did I gasp and pant:
An unhappy bill collector and eight tiny accountants.

The door flew open and in they came,
Stern-Looking men with bills in my name.

On Discover, on Visa, on American Express,
On MasterCard too, I sadly confess,
Right to my limits, then beyond my net worth,
Over the top I had charged, in a frenzy of mirth.

The black-suited men, so somber, so strict,
I wonder why me that they had first picked.

They stared at me with a look I couldn't miss,
That said Buddy, when are you paying for this?

I shrugged my shoulders, but then I grew bolder,
Went to the cabinet and pulled out a folder.

As you can see, I said with a smile,
It's bankruptcy that I'll have to file!
And with a swoop of my arm, my middle digit extended
I threw the bills in the fire: the matter had ended.

The scent of burnt ash came to my nose,
As up the chimney my credit-worthiness rose.

Without another word they turned and walked out,
Got into their limo's, but one gave a shout:
You may think that's the answer to all of your fears,
But it's nothing you'll charge for at least seven years!